My answer is yes and no. Let me explain and then you be the judge.

First off it depends on who you are working with and if you have preplanned all your options.

What does that mean? It means shopping more than one vendor for the items you want to have included the day of your wedding. Most all vendors will work with you to some degree.

If you visit a vendor and ask about their pricing for example, say flowers, they will first ask a few questions to find out what kind of wedding you are having and where. Is it formal? Is it an out door wedding? How many people will need bouquets, boutineers or arrangements for the ceremony/reception site. They have to start somewhere so they can give you prices.

To frame this in another way, it is like going in and buying a car. You tell the dealer “I want to buy a car”. Well, until you tell the dealer what kind of car or features it must have, he really doesn’t know what you need. He could take you out to the most expensive car on his lot and try to sell you. Will you be happy or buy? Maybe, but not likely.

You need to know what you want before you visit a wedding vendor. You also need to know your budget. If you go into a grocery store with no list, more than likely you will come out of the store with more than you intended to purchase. Having a list and budget in mind keeps you from over spending no matter what store or vendor you meet with.

OK, now a partial list of pitfalls to watch out for when planning your wedding and the hidden prices that go with them. After reading the list you should know how to shop any vendor.

Wedding Dress Alterations

Wedding dresses can be pretty pricey. Bridal shops don’t want to scare you off, but by not telling brides that alterations, for a custom fit, are not included in the price of the gown until after you pay is wrong. Someone has to spend time fitting your gown and that someone has to be paid for their time.

Look at it from your own angle. You wouldn’t expect your boss to pay you for working eight hours when you really worked nine would you? It is the same principle. Not mentioning it until you receive your pay check and then finding out what happen can tend to piss you off.

The only time alterations might be included in the price of the gown is when the price of the gown has been marked up to cover that expense. Beware if that is the case. This might only be for a minor alteration. A simple hem may run around $100.00 dollars. Rebuilding a bodice or moving zippers can send the price of the gown up even farther.

So how do you get around this added expense? Ask the store what the charges will be for each alteration for a custom fit. You can skip this all together if you don’t mind tugging or pulling your gown up all day. I’m thinking you will have better things to do with your hands though like hugging guests, eating cake…..and don’t forget the photos. An ill fitting gown will show it’s ugly head in all of your photographs.

You can also opt to take your gown to a seamstress who may or may not be less expensive. Again ask questions before purchasing the gown.

Just remember this is not the time for someone who says they can sew like your aunt Jane. If she has been altering gowns for years and knows how to handle the different fabrics, laces and beading then go for it. Always know who will be doing the alterations and what their experience level is before handing your gown over.

This one tip alone can save some tears and frustration. If anything happens, you most likely will be paying someone else to fix it. Not a fun thing to pay twice and the headache – we won’t go there.

If the alteration prices are more than you are willing to invest in a gown, shop around for another. Only you can be the judge with your money if this is thee gown.

Photographer/Vidoegrapher

These vendors or booked for a certain amount of time on your wedding day. If you run over the allotted time there will be added expenses. How much you ask? That depends how much they charge per hour. You may have bought a package, but if you extend that package unknowingly you will be stuck with extra charges when all is done and said. Pay attention to how your day is planned before hiring these vendors. Ask what the package includes and what is the cut off time before incurring extra expenses. You might want to delegate one person or couple to make sure vendors leave when their time is up to avoid surprise charges. You may be wrapped up in the day and over look little things like this.

Postage Stamps

What? Postage stamps? Yes. Stationers do not advertise shipping prices. If you knew that fancy large sized invitation was going to cost you around $2.00 to send, you would opt for a less expensive, smaller and cheaper version to say the same thing. Skip fancy boxed cards with all the fillers. They just add expense to your bottom line.

Rental Transport

This is a cost from any vendor that transports rental equipment such as tables, chairs, backdrops for decorating…. to your ceremony or reception site. You might think this would be included with the rental fee, but sometimes it is not. Unless you have a van or pick-up to haul these items yourself, ask if there are any fees before renting. If you wager in your gas and time, it may pan out. If not shop around. There may be other vendors that charge a bit more but transporting may be included in the price.

There are many vendors you will be visiting. Knowing a little bit about weddings and their prices before hand will keep you with in your budget. Always ask questions. What, if any, are the additional expenses you will incur by hiring or spending money with each vendor? Remember to read contracts carefully before signing. Have your spouse to be, family member or friend look them over as well . Sometimes in the excitement of planning, small things are often over looked.

If you are new to Kevin Hogan, you will be inspired by this book and how you too can live life on your own terms.  Kevin’s past books which include:

• The Psychology of Persuasion: How to Persuade Others to Your Way of Thinking 
• Covert Hypnosis: An Operator’s Manual
• Talk Your Way to the Top
• The Science of Influence

are just some of his works of  art he shares with readers.

Why would this be of interest on a site about ”Every Thing Bridal” you might ask? Good question. Let me explain.

After I read the book, I thought about all the couples that come to this site looking for information about wedding tips and ideas.

How can they get the wedding they want no matter what their budget is or where they live? It all boils down to a timeline. Knowing what you want is step one.

In Kevin Hogan’s book he helps you set up a time plan system for your life. Not just one day.

How cool would that be?

What would it be worth to live the life you truely want?

If you have read any of Kevin’s other books, you know the value and research that goes into each one. If you have never heard of him, you are in for a treat. A must read so you can live life on your terms and have it all.

You can read reviews and check it out for your self at Amazon

I did my first Bridal-Threads Video. It still needs alot of spice and editing, but you will get the message.

 I’d like to share one idea with you about freeing up some closet space. So if you have a closet full of clothes with nothing to wear, this video might get you inspired. 

If this video got you thinking, consider recycling your clothes like the bridal-threads video. Don’t let your closet have all the fun.

The best first step would be to take inventory of what you already both have. Next, you can jump on line or browse through magazines to see what is available.

Online just google bridal or wedding registry. The search will floor you. As far as magazines, any bridal magazine will have suggested places to register and plenty of ideas and pictures to wet the appetite.

Another place is store registries. Make a few stops at some of your favorite places to shop and browse their inventory. Depending on how involved your fiance wants to get, you may want to make these initial trips alone. With hectic schedules, you can gather information and share it with him later.

What kind of entertaining do you both enjoy?

What are your favorite colors?

What are your interests?

Do you have a hobby?

Thinking about some of these questions before you register will ensure gifts you will both enjoy receiving. I also gives your guests options and ideas of the items you are interested in.

Today the door is wide open when it comes to choosing what can be on your registry. After the two of you discuss your interest, make an appointment with a registry consultant. Try to schedule this on a week day evening to avoid crowds. By meeting with a consultant, they are able to help you coordinate color patterns and tailor the size of your list to the number of guests invited to your wedding.

In today’s world, technology makes registering a little fun. With the use of scan guns, you zap the items bar code (guys love this hands on approach) and that item is added to your list. Everything is computerized. Guests will have the list within minutes to do there shopping. Remember to choose items in several price ranges – from a $25.00 car kit to a $250.00 place setting. Some family guests or bridal parties pool together for a group gift.

Another great thing about this is the fact most stores have online sites. Ordering a gift for your wedding couldn’t be easier. In this fast paced world, a guest can order a gift over their noon lunch break or later at night after checking their email.

Gifts can be sent ahead of time for guests with prior obligations and unable to attend the wedding. And there are others organized enough to purchase a gift in advance to avoid last minute shopping when the list has less to choose from.  

OK, now for the basics. These are items you may want to consider. They are the essentials when first setting up house.

Tableware:

• 8 – 12 place settings in your chosen pattern (formal patterns usually have a dinner plate, salad/dessert plate, bread & butter plate, cup & saucer) Other additional pieces to consider are a soup/cereal  bowl, platters, gravy boat and sugar bowl and creamer. You can also register for a casual set which has four pieces. To avoid duplicates register at one store. If you don’t have much space, limit the number of setting. You can always add to the set later.

Flatware:

• Order the same quantity as you did for place settings. This includes a Dinner fork, Dinner knife, salad/dessert fork and tea dessert spoon. If you choose a formal and casual set, you can opt for a set in sterling silver and stainless steel.

Glassware:

• Again, register for the same quantity of glasses as you did for dinnerware. It maybe a good idea to have an extra set for hosting parties or family gatherings. The most used pieces are the goblet, ice beverage glass, wine glasses and or champagne flutes. Extra sets of plain old fashion glasses are a good idea too.

Cookware:

• Cookware can be registered for in sets or individula pieces. Some of the main pieces include a 10″ frying pan, griddle pan, tow and three quart sauce pans, six quart stockpot and roating pan. When choosing your cookware remember that quality is best. The better the cookware the better your heat distribution will be making for some good cooking.

Kitchen Basics:

• Some of the small kitchen appliances you might want to consider are a Blender, Electric can opener, Coffee maker, Hand Mixer, Microwave, Toaster and Food  processor. For your cutlery, it is nice to have a 8″ chef knife, Utility knife, Paring knife, Shears, Bread knife, 8 – 12 Steak knives and a Knife block to store them.

Linens:

• It is a good thing to register for at least three sets of sheets and pillow cases. Other accessories might include a Comforter, Bed skirt, extra Pillows and blankets. For the bath, register for at least three sets of towels which include the hand, face and bath towels. Think about a shower curtain, bath mats or rugs and guest towels.

Once you register, stay organized. Save mailing labels on packages. They are proof of purchases. You may need them in case of returns or exchanges. Keep track of your list and who sent what in your wedding planner. It makes sending out Thank-Yous much easier.

It seems like a daunting list to set up house doesn’t it? Keeping some of the basics in mind before registering your wedding, will save you time and  money. Once the wedding planning is over and you start your new life together, there will be plenty of other things to do besides shop for the basics.

For some brides and grooms the question of having children involved in the wedding is pure joy while others shun the idea.

Children do and say the darnedest things. We need to remember as adults we are their role models. What they say and do they have learned from us.

What is Your Age?

One of the important issue for couples to keep in mind is the age of the children involved. The age range for flower girls and ring bearers is four to eight years old. Children younger can be unpredictable to walk down the aisle alone. Those older than eight feel the role is babyish. The best deciding factor is how well you know the child yourself. 

If you come from a large family and making a decision as to who will be chosen, choose all of them. How? Consider having them walk down the aisle with the bride carrying the train.

Too Old or TOO Young

If you have nieces/nephews, cousins or friends in the preteen stage that you would like to be included at your wedding, ask them to be a junior bridesmaids or usher. The role is similar to the adult version: the junior bridesmaid can wear the same style gown in a coordinating or different color. Just make sure it is a more youthful design (no plunging necklines or high cut slits).

Other roles to consider:

• candle lighter
• guest book attendant
• greeter who hands out programs
• head table servers
• hands out bubbles or bird seed

Most children feel special when asked to share in your day.

VIP

Do you want to show those children who much you care about them? Have them seated at their own table. Think small. Everything from the table and chairs to the decor can be down sized for the mini me gang. You can rent or borrow kid-sized furniture. Try to have a space for the children that has easy access yet not disturb adults. Hiring a babysitter or having an adult supervise the table will keep things from getting out of hand.

As far as decorating the table, remember that children are curious little creatures. They will touch and handle anything and everything. Save candles, flower vases with water, knives…for adult tables only. Create child friendly decorations such as floral shaped cookies or lollipops. Using paper table cloths are great for drooling and spills. Goodie bags filled with coloring books, games or puzzles can keep the little ones occupied instead of wondering when the adults will be finished eating.

Dealing with children at weddings can be easy and fun. And if you have plastic cups for the little darlings, they will toast their best to your future.